The Second Side

I could put something really witty here if I wanted.

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When you stop believing in coincidence, paranoia is only a heartbeat away.

Tuesday, May 16, 2006

What the World Almost Lost

Yesterday, while driving on the highway, my wife narrowly missed a collision with another vehicle whose crazy driver was either fleeing the police or unconscious behind the wheel. Only a matter of seconds or less separated her from a nasty crash that could have been fatal.
She told me this over the phone, and it dawned on me immediately that I could easily have had the sheriff or the state patrol on the line, telling me about a bad accident, gee we're sure sorry and would I mind coming down to make an identification? I remember noticing details around me——sun shining bright, kids eating lunch, Eagles on the stereo, etc., and how those details came this close to forming a sort of psychological restore point. A place where everything starts over.

I don't talk about Tracey much. Not because she's unimportant or a source of shame. I'm simply respecting her privacy. Once I open the door, sometimes it's hard to know where the line is drawn between what can be shared or not. But, in this case I'd like to crack the door a little.

This October will be our 13th wedding anniversary. We've lived in a few cities and states. We've made friends and then said goodbye. We brought in two furry cats—one we lost last year, the other still with us for nearly the entire stretch. We have two beautiful, twin daughters, Laura and Abby. They are intelligent to an almost freakish degree (I say that with only a mild bias).

Although the flames of passion that make relationships so much fun in the beginning have cooled a little, the benefit is to be left with a friend. I'm talking about friendship deeper and more everlasting than you can possibly imagine (if you can, you know what I'm talking about). A friend who agrees with you that no matter how hard things get, quitting is not an option. She's a woman who continues to believe in me when I've lost faith in myself. A woman I don't have to worry about out in the world because I know she puts up with less shit from others than me, and that ain't much. She is pure beauty in the classical sense. Intelligent in a way that defies comprehension yet provides inspiration. A woman whose maternal instincts continue to amaze. I could not be more fortunate to have this woman be the mother of my children.

They say the best thing a father can do for his children is love their mother. I'm trying, girls, although she makes it pretty easy.

I am proud to tell the world that Tracey is my wife.


Blogger Tricia said...

That's so sweet Fletcher.
For some reason I think she would probably say something close to that about you too.

Just for the record-- they don't ask you to identify the body anymore. They have technology to do that stuff. It's actually more aggravating that way. No time to hope that a mistake was made.

My mom had a close call a few months ago and I got a cell phone call-- she said she needed to tell me that she loves me and that I make her proud. It scared her so bad that she realized that she could have died without saying those words to me. I think these close calls are in our lives to serve that purpose, to remind us that each day is precious.

Your Tracey sounds wonderful.

6:52 PM  
Blogger Fletcher said...

Um... He's Starsky. I'm Hutch.


Glad that whatever Force in The Universe who watches your wife was doing Their job.

I shall be vulgarly wealthy by October. I shall send the two of you something nice and extravagant.

I like knowing Unbroken Couples. It's one of the reasons I keep deflecting the asteroids. I like the fact that you are man enough to say it.

I like these things alot.

*hugs* to you and your kin.

10:40 PM  
Anonymous wapiti said...

When you and Tracey met years ago at a Halloween party, I somehow knew then that you would be together forever. I don't know how I knew, Tracey often asks me that, but I don't have a good answer. I'm so very happy that you found each other and have made a life together. She is my best friend of nearly 30 years and I couldn't agree more with everything you said about her. We are so blessed to have her in our lives. Thank you for opening the door a bit and sharing. I loved it.

12:28 AM  
Blogger Heather said...

I agree with Tricia. I believe in always letting the people you love know how you feel, but sometimes we forget in the crush of daily life. Anything that can remind us that we are still alive is a blessing.

I've been married just over a year, and if anything happened to Chris I don't know what I'd do. He's my other half, part of my soul, and we don't have the benefit of 13 years of growing together. I can't yet imagine what having a friend like that is like, but I hope one day I am fortunate enough to find out.

I wlll say a prayer to the Goddess and thank her for keeping you and Tracey safe and healthy, and happy. There are too many bad things in this world already, without having them happen to the good people.


10:20 AM  
Blogger Jimmy said...

Tricia: She is indeed wonderful. Those close calls are hard on the ol' ticker, but useful to be sure. We get so lost in the day-to-day routine. And you can call me Fletcher is that does it for you. :)

Fletcher: It's not normally my style to stand on the mountaintop and shout "I love this woman!" but sometimes it feels really good. Oh, and since you're about to become vulgarly wealthy, I'm sure I speak on behalf of the coven when I say you'll be getting our Christmas lists soon.

Wapiti: Ah, yes, I remember that night. Maybe I should post photos of me dressed as a transvestite and Tracey as the Bride of Frankenstein? I'm glad that we serve as an ongoing validation of your intuition. We are very lucky to have her, and we are lucky to have your friendship as well.

Heather: Your prayers are appreciated. I'm glad you have someone to "share your soul" with. Funny how that can be terrifying and comforting at the same time, eh?

9:41 AM  
Blogger Davis said...

Losing someone in an instant is something no one should ever experience. Definately make the most of any time you have to share together...

and you should be proud. You got a "one in a million".

8:36 PM  
Blogger Tricia said...

I may have been drinking Nigel.

Somehow I always think of you two together as one. But not in a homosexual way. Just in an interchangable way. Or something.

I think now would be a good time to shut up. Or not.

12:08 AM  
Anonymous domini girl said...

so sweet and cool what did u say.
well. nice blog. take care and visit me. bye!!

4:24 PM  
Blogger Tree said...

This is absolutely beautiful. I'm so happy that you're blessed with three lovely ladies in your home.

And this

"They say the best thing a father can do for his children is love their mother. I'm trying, girls, although she makes it pretty easy."

brought a tear to my eye.

You can shout on the mountaintop anytime you like. We all love hearing it.

And Tricia, lay off the sauce!

7:03 PM  
Blogger Jimmy said...

Davis: Yes, I know you know about this more than anyone would want. I am indeed fortunate. And so are you.

Tricia: Quite alright. It's a compliment to be interchanged with Fletcher. I think I like the drunk version of you. Just as long as the KKK doesn't take you away, baby.

Domini: Thanks for your nice comment and for stopping by. I shall visit you soon.

Tree: It felt so good brag. I should do it more often. I'll do the shouting, as long as you keep doing the singing.

8:49 PM  

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