The Second Side

I could put something really witty here if I wanted.

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When you stop believing in coincidence, paranoia is only a heartbeat away.

Friday, July 29, 2005

Burt & Willie, Sittin' In a Tree . . .

Burt Reynolds says that if he were gay, he could've hooked up with Willie Nelson and saved millions in divorce money. That marijuana expense, though . . .

More New York Newspeak.

New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg engaged in even more hysterical verbal contortions in explaining why the subway searches are being conducted randomly. So, here's where we currently stand, according to the Mayor:
  • We don't know what terrorists look like. They are just as likely to be blue-eyed females as brown-eyed men.
  • Terrorists come in "all shapes and sizes and forms."
  • Randomly searching everyone under the assumption that anyone could be a terrorist is actually a restriction of police power.
  • Concentrating searches on people of certain ethnic backgrounds is a violation of the principle of "innocent until proven guilty," but searching people of all races and creeds—thereby treating everyone as a suspected criminal—is not.
  • Police can stop and search someone if they have "reasonable suspicion." According to Bloomberg, an example of reasonable suspicion would be someone walking down the street wearing a backpack with wires sticking out and a sign that says "bomb." Bloomberg did not say how many people searched in the subway met that description.
Got that?

Thursday, July 28, 2005

Do What You're Told

A woman in North Carolina has been cited for misdemeanor obstructing and delaying after calling 911 to verify the identity of a police officer who came to her door.
Just remember, keep your head down, your mouth shut and say "baa-baa" like a good citizen would.

"We're Not Talking About Flatulence."

They are studying "volatile organic compounds." It is not "fart science."

Subway Shooting Story Changes Yet Again

The initial reports of the Brazilian national shot by London police July 22 told us that the man was "directly linked" to the subway bombings and that he wore a bulky jacket that might have concealed a bomb and jumped the ticket barrier when police identified themselves. Police have already admitted Jean Charles de Menezes was not connected to the bombing. Now, de Menezes's family claims the police have admitted he was not wearing a bulky jacket, nor did he jump the ticket barrier. The police investigation is expected to take "several months," by which time this whole incident will have been conveniently forgotten.

Retired Navy Man Spots Giant UFO

A Navy veteran with 10,000 hours of flight experience witnesses a UFO that he estimates to be the size of two—that's two—USS Nimitz aircraft carriers. I'm sure it won't be long before some smug skeptic is harrumphing that he merely saw a cloud formation, a sun dog, a flock of seagulls or bemoan the fact that there are no pictures or video, even though the skeptics have cleverly framed the debate so no evidence will be good enough (pictures can be faked, video can be edited, witnesses are unreliable, you get the idea).
Make sure to take the last two paragraphs to heart.

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

Bag Searches May Nab Blue-Eyed Female Terrorists!

If you haven't seen New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg's recent comments on why everyone must submit to random bag searches in the subway, and if you haven't laughed yet today, you can kill two birds with one stone.
After that, check out this quiz, brought to us courtesy of Jim Marrs (no fan of the Bush administration, it's worth noting).

CAFTA=New World Order?

Here's some thoughts on CAFTA from Pat Buchannan. Buchannan, by the way, is not the right-wing bigot he's been made out to be in some circles . . .

Everyone Breathe Easy. We're Safe Now.

A 62-year-old woman has been convicted of assaulting an airport security screener, and by "assault" we mean grabbing the screener's breasts after the screener had checked under granny's breasts to make sure she wasn't smuggling something dangerous under her boobs. Now that this extremely dangerous potential terrorist (and retired schoolteacher) won't be on a plane for a while, I just might leave the house and talk a walk in the sunshine.
Of course, granny's most serious crime was in refusing to behave like a meek sheep and allow herself to be felt up under the silly notion that anyone may be a probable terrorist. Anyone who steps out of line and disrupts our illusion of safety will be dealt with swiftly and harshly.
Is anyone else getting tired of this?

Tuesday, July 26, 2005

Paul McCartney, Russia and Charles Manson

If you haven't seen Paul McCartney's "Live in Red Square" yet, you should. It's an impressive show. Along with concert footage, there is commentary by American and Russian authors that is very enlightening.
Beatles music was banned in the former Soviet Union. Beatles albums could only be purchased on the black market, costing half an average month's wage and bringing with it risk of arrest, loss of job and educational opportunities. Just imagine what it must have meant to those who braved such a risk to be able to gather in Red Square and rock out.
Vladimir Putin is in the audience, and he sits ramrod-straight and stone-faced most of the time, although I think I spotted him clapping during "Hey Jude."
Speaking of Sir Paul, I read an article in the wake of the Live 8 concerts criticizing McCartney for performing "Helter Skelter." The author called the song a "weird choice" due to Charles Manson's twisted interpretation of it. Since when does Charles Manson decide who gets to claim moral ownership of anyone's songs but his own? I think it's way past time for McCartney to reclaim what is a pretty hard rockin' tune. Manson would be disappointed, I'm sure, to learn that "Helter Skelter" is not about a race war but an amusement park ride.

Monday, July 25, 2005

Michael Hutchence Disappointed He's Dead

Here's a quote from INXS guitarist, Tim Farriss, speculating on what the late Michael Hutchence might think of the band's effort to find a new lead singer via reality TV:
He always had a great sense of humor. But, I also think he'd be kind of bummed, because he's dead—he'd be really disappointed that we had to make the show in the first place.
Then just imagine how bummed he'd be over the fishy circumstances and vicious rumors surrounding his death.

Unfortunate Headline of the Day

Probably not the best headline to use when the story is about a terrorist bombing.

Strike a Blow Against Terrorism . . . Get Naked!

Check out Vox Day's latest column, where he takes the asinine "if you're doing nothing wrong, you have nothing to hide" thinking to its only logical conclusion. All those software moguls and government officials who condescendingly tell us that we have no privacy left anyway can now lead by example.
It would be an amusing (although slightly nauseating) sight to see their pasty white asses walking to work, wouldn't it? Don't hold your breath though . . .

Sunday, July 24, 2005

Things I'll Tell My Daughters, Part One

I remember once having a rather heated verbal altercation with a supervisor at work. The manager came to me and said that if I couldn't respect the person, I should try to respect the position. You should know that anyone who tells you to respect the postion and not the person is speaking of someone who does not deserve respect in the position or as a person.

Entering the Stream

I've tried too long to think of something profound to start out with, which does not speak well of me, I suppose. However, it is late here, and I've decided to simply jump into the stream of consciousness. I'll start off with an ongoing series I'll be posting called "Things I'll Tell My Daughters."